Domestic discipline and servitude are for those who are looking explore their sexuality even more than where they are now. One could want to incorporate domestic discipline in their sexual life just because they are curious or because they want to see how it enhances their relationship. Although both domestic discipline and servitude are practiced by vanilla partners too, the idea of discipline and services instantly points towards the world of BDSM and BDSM dating.

BDSM was once a taboo subject, but thanks to its portrayal in the mainstream media, it isn’t something that is frowned upon as much as it once was. Some introduce BDSM is their life because they feel that even when their relationship feels complete there is something lacking on the sexual side. Both BDSM partners define roles for each other to follow and lay out their expectations on the table at the start. This requires honest communication, so whether you are someone who is practicing servitude or domestic discipline in the vanilla world or BDSM, communication is a must. Before going into further details let’s take a look at what domestic discipline means.

Domestic Discipline In BDSM Dating
The word discipline itself points to that fact that someone has authority over the other. When domestic discipline is practiced the domme has authority over her submissive. The dominant partner creates rules and informs the submissive of them. In case of any violation of the rules, the dominant has all the power to punish their submissive by means which are also agreed upon.

The means of punishment depend on the level of BDSM relationship you are at. For some spanking feels enough, while others go for more complex and demanding punishments. This is something the dominant and submissive have to decide mutually.

Where’s the Focus in Domestic Discipline?
We’ve already discussed BDSM dating in this article, but that does not mean that all the focus of partners in domestic discipline is on the activity it brings with it in the result of a violation. The punishment only comes when the submissive has done something they weren’t supposed to do. Other than that the focus is on disciplining yourself at all times. Power exchange and punishment do come under the umbrella of domestic discipline but the dynamic of domestic discipline isn’t as broad as the BDSM. Rather, it is something that may be considered as a branch of BDSM.

Many argue that domestic discipline does not come under BDSM because some vanilla partners may not include activities such as bondage when practicing discipline.

Always Consensual
Be it vanilla or BDSM, domestic discipline has to always be consensual. This is something that remains constant and an integral part of any servitude dynamic. You can’t just go to your partner one day and initiate spanking and hope they like it. That’s just wrong. If they have never experienced any such thing before, it is your duty to explain to them why you want to try this and may learn a little before experiencing. Take it slow and easy, and help them develop the level of interest you have in domestic discipline by explaining it to them.

Without consent and rules things can get out of hand very swiftly, which is why both partners need to discuss it at the start and if there is disagreement on one side, there is no option but consider it at another time…or look for another partner.

Domestic Discipline: Structured Relationships
If you are the least bit involved in the BDSM community, you will know that a BDSM relationship is more successful than vanilla ones. This is because since everything is agreed upon, there are lesser fights. If a submissive strays from the norm, clear punishments are decided and the knowledge of what those punishments entail is very clear as well. There is a constant state of check and balance which hinders partners getting off track and leads to a more satisfying relationship.

Moreover, the power of a dominant isn’t unlimited as well. To be a dominant is to have a great responsibility. You have to take control of situations while also taking care of the fact that you don’t get abusive and everything remains consensual. All this constant control over whatever the partners do while serving one another makes for an exciting and happier relationship.

Know What You Want
The key to a great domestic discipline or servitude dynamic is knowing what you want. Consent, excitement and everything is left behind if you do not know what you expect from the relationship. Don’t rush into any BDSM relationship because that would only hurt you both. Compatibility is important. Whatever you practice in a BDSM relationship must be governed by both of your needs. Before sitting with them, sit with yourself to define what you need from the relationship.