If you’ve ever thought about practicing a little BDSM bondage with your vanilla partner you’re definitely not alone. If you’re in a BDSM relationship, bondage might be something you’re already practicing or have thought of practicing with your submissive or dominant. Bondage is not new and has been around for hundreds of years. With a little research, one can find numerous references to bondage in art history.

A recent example of how bondage is something most of us enjoy is the massive success of 50 Fifty Shades of Grey. As an ardent BDSM practitioner, you might not agree with the power dynamics shown in this movie but the fact that the novel sold millions of copies is a proof that bondage is something many of us fantasize about. Bondage can now be seen in mainstream media and the number of BDSM dating sites has also increased.

The question of why restraining your partner for pleasure feels so good is also as old as the practice of bondage itself and does not have a single reason. Every one of us is unique and can have different reasons for liking a bit of bondage in our sex lives. For instance, being restrained and the anticipation of what’s next can create an unforgettable adrenaline rush in your body. However, bondage is not all about physical pleasure, it is also romantic. More on that later.

Bondage in BDSM
The B in the term BDSM denotes bondage. It means binding your submissive for sexual and physiological stimulation of both the partners. Following are some tips for people who’ve been in a BDSM relationship for some time now and haven’t practiced bondage or want to take it to the next level and want to tell their partner about this.

No Newbies Allowed
Bondage is exciting but it is also serious business which is why you shouldn’t try it with a partner who knows nothing about it. This advice is especially important for submissives. Your dominant should be well-versed with BDSM, bondage techniques and other relevant stuff to help you practice it while also remains safe.

Shrug Off Confusions
Bondage might seem scary to a novice submissive and can be difficult for beginners. In such a scenario, it is the duty of the dominant to comfort their submissive and learn about bondage together. Look at the many positive aspects of bondage and portray it to your partner as something that can improve your relationship.

In BDSM relationships, partners already know will most likely be there but the level of comfort differs for each one of us which the other person is unfamiliar with and that’s where communication comes in.

Open Communication
A BDSM relationship can become stagnant without open communication and trust amongst partners. Without communication you can’t open up to them about your kinks, after a while there’s nothing new to try, hence your relationship becomes boring. Moreover, without complete trust, a dominant cannot enjoy total control of their submissive.

A great way to establish trust is to introduce a safe word if you haven’t already. Some submissive think that if a safe word is needed for something the practice must be hard and painful but in fact, a safe word is there to help. This way a submissive can know that if he or she utters a single word whatever’s happening will stop. This can lead to more trust amongst partners and a BDSM relationship where they can push their limits together. The idea of giving your control to your partner, being restrained and completely trusting them is also extremely romantic.

Start Slow
If your partner is completely new to bondage it is advised that you start with simple toys and gradually build towards something demanding. Trying too many things at the start can have a reverse effect; instead of exciting them it can confuse your partner.

Today we have all sorts of bondage tools available. Some of them have a softer outlook while other are for experts. Know the comfort level of your submissive and start from there. It is likely that if your submissive has not tried bondage they might not know what they’re comfortable with. Again, in this case, you will have to start slow and listen to any concerns your submissive has. Their comfort level will definitely improve over time.

Never Stop Communicating
Tonight is the night. You and your partner are ready to indulge in some bondage. You’ve worked hard to make them ready and excited for this moment. It is time for some steamy kinky action! But you’d be mistaken if you think communication stops here. It is easy to get distracted by all the hot kinky stuff but never forget to be aware of what your partner is communicating to you. Look for any non-verbal signs such as shifting body language and decide whether you need to stop for a moment or take it to the next level.

Remember, a being dominant is a huge responsibility and a good one is always aware of their submissive’s needs. Taking care of a submissive’s needs creates trust and allows them to feel safe, both of which are pivotal to a BDSM practice.